How to be a better son / daughter.

SHARED THOUGHTS - 19.07.2014.

As we chase the golden goose in our rat race, we  are bombarded with advise, lectures and seminars on how to increase our value to the company we work. We also lecture to those working for us, how to be more productive to the organization. We are told our duties and obligations towards our neighbors, friends, society…et al.

 We all forget while we are entrapped in this commercial & social web, to ponder how we can become a better person to our parents. If we can develop this consideration as a matter of habit, we automatically instill in ourselves the need to be a better person to all..including the organization and the society. While it may require a whole lot of interpersonal skills and talents to be appreciated by the boss and friends, what it takes is only a simple consideration of sparing your precious time to the most precious people you are most highly indebted to in life.      

How I can be a better daughter or a better son?

IT DOES NOT COST MUCH TO BE A BETTER SON OR A DAUGHTER ( from a forward received)

I was teaching one day a leadership course for a large healthcare company at the Oakland Convention Center.

There were about a thousand managers and union leaders in the room.

One women sitting near the front, was given the microphone and rose to speak to me and to the entire room. It takes a lot of courage to speak up in front of thousands leaders - including top executives-so I was curious to hear what she was about to say.

"I have read many of the things that you have written and have been to your course a couple of times before," she said. "There is one thing that you have always left out in your teaching that I believe you should add."

I leaned forward with interest to learn that what I have been leaving out for all these years.

You always talk about the value of asking direct reports, 'How can I be a better manager?'
Or asking co-workers, How can I be a better team player?'
Or asking customers,' How I can be a better supplier?'
And even asking partners or children, How can I be a better partner or better parent?'

The one thing that you have always left out that you should start teaching everyone is to ask their parents, *'How I can be a better daughter or a better son?'"* She went on with her personal story.

"After my last course with you, as you suggested, I asked my daughter, 'What can I do to be a better mother?

We had a wonderful discussion. Then I thought, why not call my mother? I called and asked her, 'What can I do to be a better daughter?'

"Mom said  'Now that Dad is dead, I live all alone. Every day I walk up that long drive to go to the mailbox. Almost every day there is nothing in it. This makes me feel very lonely. It would mean so much for me if you could send me some cards; or pictures, or notes.'

"After our talk, I started sending cards, pictures and notes to my mother so when she walked to the mailbox there would be something there. What did that cost me? Nothing. What did that mean to my mom? Everything. Please teach the people you meet to ask their parents, 'What can I do to be a better daughter or son?"

I still get tears in my eyes when I think about this woman and her mother, and I have included her story in almost every class I have conducted for the past year.

This is good advice for three reasons:

1) It is good for them. Even if they say, "There is nothing you can do to be a better son or daughter," they will be happy that you cared enough to ask.

2) It is good for you. The No.1 regret that children have when their parents die: "Why didn't I let them know how much I appreciated all that they did for me?"

3) If you have children, asking your parent(s) how you can be a better child is good for your children, too.

You know that old person - your parent - whom you're calling on the phone?

 

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Assumptions are the termites of relationships.

 

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Don't Wait For Tomorrow

Gravity is not responsible for people to fall in love. It just happens.
And when it does happen, don't wait for the right time to express,
because right time is when your heart beats faster.

If you love someone.. don't wait for tomorrow, 
or for the other person to make the move.

Agreed 'Tomorrow never dies', 
but also remember 'Tomorrow never comes, so live in today.'  

 

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Given below are two stories.. not a fiction, but true life episodes. One deals with a parent who decided to cast aside his dark side and come clean for the sake of his son whom he loved very much …  he decided to be a good parent… so that his son would grow to be a worthy son.  Now read on.

Story No.1.

Many years ago, Al Capone virtually owned Chicago . Capone wasn't famous for anything heroic. He was notorious for enmeshing the windy city in everything from bootlegged booze and prostitution to murder.

Capone had a lawyer nicknamed "Easy Eddie." He was Capone's lawyer for a good reason. Eddie was very good! In fact, Eddie's skill at legal maneuvering kept Big Al out of jail for a long time.

To show his appreciation, Capone paid him very well. Not only was the money big, but Eddie got special dividends, as well. For instance, he and his family occupied a fenced-in mansion with live-in help and all of the conveniences of the day. The estate was so large that it filled an entire Chicago City block.

Eddie lived the high life of the Chicago mob and gave little consideration to the atrocity that went on around him.

Eddie did have one soft spot, however. He had a son that he loved dearly. Eddie saw to it that his young son had clothes, cars, and a good education. Nothing was withheld. Price was no object.

And, despite his involvement with organized crime, Eddie even tried to teach him right from wrong. Eddie wanted his son to be a better man than he was.

Yet, with all his wealth and influence, there were two things he couldn't give his son; he couldn't pass on a good name or a good example.

One day, Easy Eddie reached a difficult decision. Easy Eddie wanted to rectify wrongs he had done.

He decided he would go to the authorities and tell the truth about Al "Scarface" Capone, clean up his tarnished name, and offer his son some semblance of integrity. To do this, he would have to testify against The Mob, and he knew that the cost would be great. So, he testified.

Within the year, Easy Eddie's life ended in a blaze of gunfire on a lonely Chicago Street . But in his eyes, he had given his son the greatest gift he had to offer, at the greatest price he could ever pay. Police removed from his p ockets a rosary, a crucifix, a religious medallion, and a poem clipped from a magazine.

The poem read:

"The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop, at late or early hour. Now is the only time you own. Live, love, toil with a will. Place no faith in time. For the clock may soon be still." 

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Story No.2.

World War II produced many heroes. One such man was Lieutenant Commander Butch O'Hare.

He was a fighter pilot assigned to the aircraft carrier Lexington in the South Pacific.

One day his entire squadron was sent on a mission. After he was airborne, he looked at his fuel gauge and real ized that someone had forgotten to top off his fuel tank.

He would not have enough fuel to complete his mission and get back to his ship.

His flight leader told him to return to the carrier. Reluctantly, he dropped out of formation and headed back to the fleet.

As he was returning to the mother ship, he saw something that turned his blood cold; a squadron of Japanese aircraft was speeding its way toward the American fleet.

The American fighters were gone on a sortie, and the fleet was all but defenseless. He couldn't reach his squadron and bring them back in time to save the fleet. Nor could he warn the fleet of the approaching danger. There was only one thing to do. He must somehow divert them from the fleet.

Laying aside all thoughts of personal safety, he dove into the formation of Japanese planes. Wing- mounted 50 caliber's blazed as he charged in, attacking one surprised enemy plane and then another. Butch wove in and out of the now broken formation and fired at as many planes as possible until all his ammunition was finally spent..

Undaunted, he continued the assault. He dove at the planes, trying to clip a wing or tail in hopes of damaging as m any enemy planes as possible, rendering them unfit to fly.

Finally, the exasperated Japanese squadron took off in another direction.

Deeply relieved, Butch O'Hare and his tattered fighter limped back to the carrier.

Upon arrival, he reported in and related the event surrounding his return. The film from the gun-camera mounted on his plane told the tale. It showed the extent of Butch's daring attempt to protect his fleet. He had, in fact, destroyed five enemy aircraft. This took place on February 20, 1942 , and for that action Butch became the Navy's first Ace of W.W.II, and the first Naval Aviator to win the Congressional Medal of Honor.

A year later Butch was killed in aerial combat at the age of 29. His home town would not allow the memory of this WW II hero to fade, and today, O'Hare Airport in Chicago is named in tribute to the courage of this great man.

So, the next time you find yourself at O'Hare International, give some thought to visiting Butch's memorial displaying his statue and his Medal of Honor. It's located between Terminals 1 and 2.

So what do these two stories have to do with each other? Well, you see, Butch O’Hare was “Easy Eddie’s” son…!! He became a worthy son for his father .. and in the process, a worthy son for the nation.

 

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In my life, the question of how to be a worthy son / daughter .. is most easily answered, with a simple glance at my wife and her siblings.  When my Father-in-law was lying helpless and in a comatose, the love and care he was constantly showered with, from his children, made me think, the greatest wealth a man can earn is unconditional love from children or kith & kin to the last breath... especially, in the final days. There is no bigger blessing than being the recipient of genuine love from at least a few ..... to earn, this I believe, we must give unconditional love at all stages in life to the ones around us.

this alone comes back. This is the guiding principle I have been following....... and it is Love that I am investing in a few close to me, untainted, pure and expecting nothing in return.

Dont know who said this.... if a man can have four persons / friends genuinely grieving for him on his passing away, he then is most blessed. ....

 

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Have a blessed week ahead leading to the final days of Ramadan.

 

Dear Lalit ......on your birthday

SHARED THOUGHTS……….01-07-14

Dear Lalit,

There was this Father’s day recently. We came across a beautiful poem, which probably was applicable to your darling daughter in her early school days. She knows you have become a shining star, up above to watch over her and her lovely mother, your best friend. Under your guidance there came along a noble soul, another of your best friend, to fill the void you left in the little child’s life… and the child & mother were blessed, not just for a moment, but for a life time, by the love of her shining star.

Her hair was up in a pony tail,
Her favourite dress tied with a bow.
Today was Daddy's Day at school,
And she couldn't wait to go.

But her mummy tried to tell her,
That she probably should stay home.
Why the kids might not understand,
If she went to school alone.

But she was not afraid;
She knew just what to say.
What to tell her classmates
Of why he wasn't there today.

But still her mother worried,
For her to face this day alone.
And that was why once again,
She tried to keep her daughter home.

But the little girl went to school
Eager to tell them all.
About a dad she never sees
A dad who never calls.

There were daddies along the wall in back,
For everyone to meet.
Children squirming impatiently,
Anxious in their seats

One by one the teacher called
A student from the class.
To introduce their daddy,
As seconds slowly passed.

At last the teacher called her name,
Every child turned to stare.
Each of them was searching,
A man who wasn't there.

'Where's her daddy at?'
She heard a boy call out.
'She probably doesn't have one,'
Another student dared to shout.

And from somewhere near the back,
She heard a daddy say,
'Looks like another deadbeat dad,
Too busy to waste his day.'

The words did not offend her,
As she smiled up at her Mum.
And looked back at her teacher,
Who told her to go on.

And with hands behind her back,
Slowly she began to speak..
And out from the mouth of a child,
Came words incredibly unique.

'My Daddy couldn't be here,
Because he lives so far away.
But I know he wishes he could be here,
Since this is such a special day.

And though you cannot meet him,
I wanted you to know.
All about my daddy,
And how much he loves me so.

He loved to tell me stories
He taught me to ride my bike..
He surprised me with pink roses,
And taught me to fly a kite.

We used to share fudge sundaes,
And ice cream in a cone.
And though you cannot see him.
I'm not standing here alone.

'Cause my daddy's always with me,
Even though we are apart
I know because he told me,
He'll forever be in my heart'

With that, her little hand reached up,
And lay across her chest.
Feeling her own heartbeat,
Beneath her favourite dress.

And from somewhere here in the crowd of dads,
Her mother stood in tears.
Proudly watching her daughter,
Who was wise beyond her years.

For she stood up for the love
Of a man not in her life.
Doing what was best for her,
Doing what was right.

And when she dropped her hand back down,
Staring straight into the crowd.
She finished with a voice so soft,
But its message clear and loud.

'I love my daddy very much,
he's my shining star.
And if he could, he'd be here,
But heaven's just too far.

But sometimes when I close my eyes,
it's like he never went away.'
And then she closed her eyes,
And saw him there that day.

And to her mothers amazement,
She witnessed with surprise.
A room full of daddies and children,
All starting to close their eyes.

Who knows what they saw before them,
Who knows what they felt inside.
Perhaps for merely a second,
They saw him at her side.

'I know you're with me Daddy,'
To the silence she called out.
And what happened next made believers,
Of those once filled with doubt.

Not one in that room could explain it,
For each of their eyes had been closed.
But there on the desk beside her,
Was a fragrant long-stemmed rose.

And a child was blessed, if only for a moment,
By the love of her shining star.
And given the gift of believing,
That heaven is never too far.

Dear Lalit,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             The time of the year is here again when all our thoughts are only of you; not that it is any less at other times, but even more so, with a date to live with the rest of our lives, when the loving calls and greetings are missing. This day you came into our lives as a bonny bundle of joy, which you were all through your 29 short years with us. Life goes on even as we struggle to cope with your loss.

This day also is the 28^th day of your new born niece; for her and her sister, as with your daughter and her sister, and for all of us who cherished your company, you are a shining star who will live forever in our hearts.

Wishing we could pluck you out from our memories & dreams, with hugs,

Yours family. 

( thank you Jimmy for the poem )

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"Permanent relations do not die for temporary reason"

 

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Wishing everyone happiness and equanimity ..  and to those fasting during Ramadan,

 

MOHANDAS. KP.

http://mohandas-sharedthoughts.blogspot.com/

Ethos of work

SHARED THOTS – 27.06.14.
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The ethos of work.

 

My nephew was the proud recipient of two global awards for excellence presented at Brisbane at GE Regional HQ. This is the umpteenth time he is winning these accolades. He has made it a habit of outsmarting his peers and galloping towards a finish line that can only be defined by him.

 

This dispatch is dedicated to him… not as a biased encomium, which he does not need, but as a study for those with similar ambitions from my own thoughts, which I am sharing with the youngsters reading this.

 

I read a note from the eminent spiritual guru Mr. Gopalakrishnan - “Work gives meaning to our life. You gift your work to the organization and the organization gives you the gift  at the end. Highest talent and deepest devotion give you a fulfilling experience in life.”

 

“Work Ethos is at the heart of why we work, what drives us and gives us purpose and meaning in the workplace. It is a state of mental being that leads to what Gallup describes as employee engagement (or disengagement)”.

 

It is said that when we work with full devotion we become more happy and contented than the management / owner. Work itself is the pathway and result for happiness for many people. Thus working is known as karma yoga. You become one with the karma / action, that you are expected to perform.

 

We have to perform the action for our personal needs, family based goals, society oriented compulsions etc. Each of these is the part of our life.  Working itself is the experience in the life.

 

When you work for one hour  with full involvement and devotion, the mental / psychological energy wastage/ utilization is approximately 20  points (say for example)  and if  we do the same work  without any interest, the energy utilization or wastage  reaches  100 points.  Thus we get easily exhausted when we do a work reluctantly. 

 

One can see many people work  late night without getting  tired  or exhausted.  This is exclusively due to the fact that their energy UTILIZATION is maximum and WASTAGE is minimum.

 

“The average person puts only 25% of his energy and ability into his work.” ~ Andrew Carnegie

 

Karma yoga is focusing on action / karma with devotion without looking deep into the reward. However result of each action is present with action/ karma, whereas reward has to come from outside.  Remember that we can get one reward from inside. That is SATISFACTION.

 

“Working hard becomes a habit, a serious kind of fun. You get self-satisfaction from pushing your self to the limit, knowing that all the effort is going to pay off.” ~ Mary Lou Retton

 

 

5 Factors That Demonstrate a Strong Work Ethic  (Small Business Index – Demand Media, USA)

 

(Look for an employee with these 5 factors.. it is then the responsibility of the Management to retain such an employee, if ever one can find such in these days).

 

·         Integrity – is given the highest importance. This is the rarest quality among senior managers.

·         Sense of Responsibility – pretty straight forward.

·         Emphasis on Quality -

Some employees do only the bare minimum, just enough to keep their job intact. Employees with a strong work ethic care about the quality of their work. They do their best to produce great work, not merely churn out what is needed. The employee's commitment to quality improves the company's overall quality.

·         Discipline – all important as crucial as ‘self-discipline’. “Your ability to discipline yourself to set clear goals, and then to work toward them every day, will do more to guarantee your success than any other single factor.” ~ Brian Tracy

 

·         Sense of Teamwork - Most employees have to work together to meet a company's objectives. An employee with a high sense of teamwork helps a team meet its goals and deliver quality work. These employees respect their peers and help where they can, making collaborations go smoother.

 

So do the work, one after the other with devotion, dedication and sincerity. When you think one  job is not good for you, quit and search for another job which gives you satisfaction. But be mindful, changing jobs alone cannot guarantee satisfaction. Remember – the grass is always greener on the other side.

 

Quitting a job:

Study shows in a majority of cases especially in large companies, one who quits a job is doing so, not for quitting from the Company, but quitting from the boss. More often than not, it is a boss who creates conditions that prompt “potential successors to him”, to leave the company. This can happen due to many reasons, common being the perception of insecurity felt by the boss – lack of confidence in his own ability, fear of being overtaken by an immediate junior etc, and more importantly the failure of Top Management to recognize ‘achievers’ down the line.

 

A good Management is one which has a system to identify potential achievers – the system must pick & choose, select and provide a ‘fast track’ for these achievers to realize their aspirations. Without a ‘track’, unfulfilled aspirations lead to discontent resulting in a potential loss to the organization. This is the most significant contribution by GE that paved the way for boys like my nephew to excel. GE Management recognized few even at Junior levels to possess the 5 factors mentioned above.  Thereafter the chosen few were put on a fast track. Their ‘involvement’ is total to the Company.

 

“Big jobs usually go to the men who prove their ability to outgrow small ones.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Yet, when involvement is total and the bar is set higher and higher, a word of caution is pertinent – as in any field, there is always a ‘burn-out’ stage. Care to be taken both by the Employer and employee to prevent this from being the case at some stage in the growth.  One’s growth must be proportionate to his potential and aspiration.

 

During employable age, it is easy to switch jobs and it is also common to find, this is not an automatic solution to overcome the feeling of discontent. Somewhere there is a line that needs to be identified which is a divide between ‘expectations’ and ‘satisfaction’.

 

There are never ending enormous reservoir of books on Management principles advocated by learned professionals, drawn from experience and practices in Industry. But the best lessons are learnt from life experiences. Simple incidents that happen around us, may seem to be of no importance to us, can be given a totally different meaning, when viewed from a different perspective.

 

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There was this robbery in Guangzhou , the robber shouted to everyone:

 

"All don't move, money belongs to the state, life belongs to you". Everyone in the bank laid down quietly.

( This is called “Mind Changing Concept – Changing the conventional way of thinking”)

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One lady lay on the table provocatively, the robber shouted at her. "Please be civilised! This is a robbery and not a rape!"

(This is called “Being Professional – Focus only on what you are trained to do!” )
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When the robbers got back, the younger robber (MBA trained) told the

older robber (who is only primary school educated),

 

"Big bro, let's count how much we got", the older robber rebutted and said,

"You very stupid, so much money, how to count, tonight TV will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!"

( This is called “Experience – nowadays experience is more important than paper qualifications!” )
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 After the robbers left, the bank manager told the bank supervisor to call the police quickly.

 

The supervisor says "Wait, wait wait, let's put the 5 million RMB we embezzled into the amount the robbers robbed".

 

( This is called “Swim with the Tide – converting an unfavourable situation to your advantage!” ) 

 

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The supervisor says "It will be good if there is a robbery every month".

( This is called “Killing Boredom – Happiness is most important!”)

 

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The next day, TV news reported that 100 million RMB was taken from the bank. 

 

The robbers counted and counted and counted, but they could only count 20 million RMB.

 

The robbers were very angry and complained "We risked our lives and only took 20 million RMB,

 

the bank manager took 80 million RMB with a snap of his fingers.

 

It looks like it is better to be educated than to be a thief!"

( This is called “Knowledge is worth as much as gold!”)

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The bank manager was smiling and happy because

 

his loss in the CINOPEC shares are now covered by this robbery.

( This is called “Seizing the opportunity – daring to take risks!”)  

 

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Have an enjoyable weekend. For the sports enthusiasts, enjoy the rest of World Cup Football and Wimbledon.

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MOHANDAS. KP.

http://mohandas-sharedthoughts.blogspot.com/

What does one really want..?

SHARED THOTS - 31.05.14. 
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What does one really want..? 

She looked like the kind of woman I could fall in love with. Trouble is, she
was standing next to the kind of woman I’d like to make love to. ” 
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The Stone Cutter - Anthony de Mello

There was once a stone cutter who was dissatisfied with himself and with his
position in life. One day he passed a wealthy merchant's house. Through the
open gateway, he saw many fine possessions and important visitors.
"How powerful that merchant must be!" thought the stone cutter. He became
very envious and wished that he could be like the merchant.

To his great surprise, he suddenly became the merchant, enjoying more
luxuries and power than he had ever imagined, but envied and detested by
those less wealthy than himself. Soon a high official passed by, carried in
a sedan chair, accompanied by attendants and escorted by soldiers beating
gongs. Everyone, no matter how wealthy, had to bow low before the
procession.

"How powerful that official is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a high
official!"

Then he became the high official, carried everywhere in his embroidered
sedan chair, feared and hated by the people all around. It was a hot summer
day, so the official felt very uncomfortable in the sticky sedan chair. He
looked up at the sun. It shone proudly in the sky, unaffected by his
presence.

"How powerful the sun is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the sun!"

Then he became the sun, shining fiercely down on everyone, scorching the
fields, cursed by the farmers and labourers. But a huge black cloud moved
between him and the earth, so that his light could no longer shine on
everything below.

"How powerful that storm cloud is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a
cloud!"

Then he became the cloud, flooding the fields and villages, shouted at by
everyone. But soon he found that he was being pushed away by some great
force, and realized that it was the wind.

"How powerful it is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the wind!"

Then he became the wind, blowing tiles off the roofs of houses, uprooting
trees, feared and hated by all below him. But after a while, he ran up
against something that would not move, no matter how forcefully he blew
against it - a huge, towering rock.

"How powerful that rock is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a rock!"

Then he became the rock, more powerful than anything else on earth. But as
he stood there, he heard the sound of a hammer pounding a chisel into the
hard surface, and felt himself being changed.

"What could be more powerful than I, the rock?" he thought.

He looked down and saw far below him the figure of a stone cutter.

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Desire is the root cause of all unhappiness.. Lord Buddha.

Order is heaven’s first law.. and this means, some are and some must be,
greater than others…. I cannot recall who said this, but these are words of
wisdom from an English poet, we read about in school.

These two are deeply etched in my mind from growing up days. No matter how
good you are at anything, you always come across someone who is superior to
you not entirely because he is more talented. Once this ‘law’ is accepted,
then many a situation that can otherwise hurt, can be handled with
equanimity and dignity. No amount of desire to be the best, ensures you will
not come across someone better than you, simply because this ‘law’ exists
and is true.

Desire is necessary nevertheless. Unfulfilled desires are perhaps the root
cause of all unhappiness, just as it is not the money that is the root cause
of all evil, but the lack of money that is; similarly, empty desire or blind
desire ‘per se’ can cause a lot of unhappiness; but a desire for something
that is a passion, is good and necessary. 

“Nothing stops the person who desires deeply to achieve…” Thomas Carlyle. We
see “desire” more as a stimulus for something else – desire to achieve,
desire to love, desire to be loved, desire to be a better person, desire –
as a craving, as a want, as a wish-for…. is what spurred the growth of
civilizations and humankind. 
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What does a man really want:  Om Swami. 

Once upon a time a man owned a beautiful garden full of awesome flowers and
fruit trees. Melodious and colorful birds tweeted, bees droned and
butterflies fluttered about in that garden. It was a lively place, like a
piece of paradise. It had a small pond too housing many kinds of lotuses.
The owner cared for his garden more than anything else in the world. In
particular, he loved a rare flower, a black Himalayan lotus with a heady
scent that flowered in all seasons.

One morning, he was tending to the roses and tulips while a nightingale sang
most sweetly. He longed to see the bird more closely and went in the
direction of the sound. There he saw the young bird pecking at the black
lotus. Its petals had come off and the lotus was mostly destroyed. He was
furious and hurled a rock at the bird but the nightingale took a swift
flight and escaped unscathed.

Grieved and angered, he vowed to catch and kill the bird. Scattering barley,
sesame seeds and jaggery near the pond, he spread a net and waited
patiently. Surely, a little while later, the nightingale came flying again
and noticed the food. She landed on the mesh and ate to her heart's content
but, realized her mistake when it was time to take off; she was stuck.

The man got hold of the bird and clutched it tightly by the neck. "I'll kill
you," he said.
"Kill me? But, why? The food was lying on the ground. I didn't steal from
your granary."
"No, not for these grains but because you destroyed my black lotus."
"I'm sorry," the nightingale pleaded. "I was only following my food chain.
Have mercy. I always thought that the owner of this beautiful garden must be
a tender, caring and a loving person. Little did I know..."
The man thought about it and a sense of compassion enveloped him. 

"Okay, I'll let you go." He loosened his grip.
"I want to tell you a secret, my friend," the nightingale said. "My vision
is penetrating. There's buried a pot full of gold at the root of the old
peepal tree in your garden. It's yours for the taking."

The man dug up the pot filled with gold coins and was ecstatic beyond bear.

"I'm curious," he said to the nightingale perched on the bough. "How come
you could see the treasure hidden under the land but couldn't see the wide
net clearly spread on the ground?"
"I had no use or craving for the gold, but I longed to eat the sesame seeds
and jaggery. While flying towards the food, all I could see was the food. My
desire had made me blind."

That's pretty much all one needs to know: desires make us blind. A mad
pursuit of endless desires makes one oblivious to what's already there to be
enjoyed. That's why Buddha called it the root of all suffering and that's
why Krishna preached detachment from the outcome of desires. Desires keep
you busy, they keep you on your toes, and above all, they make everything
you already have appear small and lacking.

You have a house and the desire to have a bigger house will repeatedly make
you feel that what you have is not enough. Your partner loves you but the
desire to have more or something else from him or her will make you feel
incomplete in the present. The desire to earn more, to have more, to be
more, to gain more and so on become great barriers to enjoying the present
moment.

I'm not suggesting that you can't have desires. Sometimes, the journey of
pursuing the object of your desire can be an exhilarating one too. Until you
reach the exalted state, it's perfectly fine to have your desires and to
pursue them, it's okay to feel elated upon their fulfillment or feel low
when they are not met. It's human, it's natural. But, it certainly helps to
be conscious of what you are pursuing in life. 

It can be a life-changing exercise ­­— to sit down in peace and question the
desires you have because once you become aware of your pursuits, you start
to see things in a new light. Predominantly because chasing your desires
with awareness does not make you blind, because mindfulness doesn't allow
you to lose sight of what you already have. This awareness keeps you
positive, it keeps you happy. It allows you to see both the net on the
ground and the pot hidden under the soil.

So, do you really want what you really want?

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“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that
what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”

Epicurus. 

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Have an enjoyable week ahead. 
MOHANDAS. KP.

http://mohandas-sharedthoughts.blogspot.com/