Attitude. judging by appearance.

SHARED THOUGHTS – 11.03.2016

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ATTITUDE !!!!!!!

 

The below mail caught my attention today. I read this few years back. Right ATTITUDE has never been illustrated more beautifully than through this simple incident.

However great you are, you can be brought down to earth, by someone you thought as a ‘nobody’. Your judgment & attitude stand exposed and a wise person learns a lesson from this. This is exactly what happened here. Please find time to read through and reflect within yourself, how many times we judge people from the exterior, without realising that a ‘rich’ heart may be hidden beneath the poor jacket.  

 

“Judging a person does not define who they are. It defines who you are”.  Every single person on the planet has a story. One cannot judge anyone by appearance. The truth often may surprise you.

 

Incident as narrated.  

Simply defined , Attitude of a person is a tendency to respond  towards another  person, an idea , an incident or  a situation . It can be negative or positive  and  influences an individual's choice of action and  their responses to challenges, incentives, and rewards . Though attitude is the principle thing in life but in no way our happiness or unhappiness depends on  its conditions  . There is a very popular saying  that our attitude toward life determines life’s attitude towards us. Thus  attitude  works as   the driving force in our lives—it can either push us to great heights or pull us down to our demise. While it is true that we are born with certain tendencies or orientations, our personalities and attitudes are developed through our relationships and experiences. Our attitudes begin to develop in childhood and constantly evolve and change over the years through day-to-day interactions and experiences. All the things which are having impact on us  have been  acquired  through the people we have been  meeting  and interacting . If we  think that all these factors have molded us into a person with a poor attitude towards life, there is no need to worry . They may be having their own perceptions about certain things because of their background , upbringing and placement .

 

Below is given an incident  narrated by a well to do senior media person on a visit  from abroad  which made him to change his attitude towards people . It has been made available on the internet under the title - A SALES GIRL IN A CHENNAI STORE .

 

AN INCIDENT BRINGING ATTITUDINAL CHANGE

 

“After the Temple Darshan at the Kapaleeswarar Koil at Mylapore , we entered the "Giri Trading" a  stores and started searching for this book on "Tattva Bodha" . There we found many people buying various books and CDs and from their smart walks and accumulation of CDs from Bhajans to songs sent a nice feeling in us, that we have come to the right place indeed.  I was looking for this Book while my wife started collecting Bharathiar songs and MS's music. Though I searched everywhere for this book but some how could not lay my hand.

 

There was this Girl, standing next to the Cashier, sincerely watching all our movements -a dark complexioned Girl, should be from a nearby Village, might be 17 or 18, should not have crossed 8th Standard , might be out of poverty she is here.. all my Journalist brain unnecessarily calculated about this gullible girl..and though she was repeatedly watching me, I ignored her and started searching for "Tattva Bodha". I saw many books from "Sandhya Vandanam" to Swami VIvekananda "Chicago Speech" but having spent a good 40 minutes. I looked at her, she also looked at me curiously. I asked her, knowing fully well that such a girl cannot have any idea of anything, leave alone "Tattva Bodha". 

 

"Sir, may I help you?" (in Tamil)

"Yes. I am looking for 'Tattva Bodha' " 

"Sanskrit Text or English/Sanskrit?" 

Oh God ,she knows.

"Sanskrit and  English" 

"Do you like to have the Publication from Chinmaya Mission or Indu Publications or by Ramakrishna Mutt?"
"I do not know..I just want to only learn you see . I dont really know indeed"

 "Do you read Tamil Sir?" 

"Yes I am a Tamilian " thinking to myself as to how most of my life time I have been liking  to act in most other  places that I am not

"Then Sir, you can take this"

 

She ran to the shelf where I had searched for 30 minutes, removed the books in the front and came out with a Book in Tamil. "This one in Tamil by N.Sivaraman byIndu Publications in fact is simple and wonderful to read . You have the Sanskrit Text too inside." Oh my God. Why did I under estimate such a genius , just because of my arrogance that I am an NRI. Or Just because I presumed such a black, dark complexioned, gullible girl, who would have come for this job out of absolute poverty, wouldn't have any idea of "Tattva Bodha" 

I decided to change my attitude and realized that I am absolutely an 'Idiot at this moment in front of this wonderful girl and submitted myself in all humility. 

"Madam, I really don't have any idea of even who wrote 'Tattva Bodha' till yesterday. I just attended a lecture on this subject and was fascinated by the lecture and hence...." 

"Did you attend Goda Venkateswara Sastri's lecture in Bhartiya Vidya Bhavan?" 

 

"Oh God. How did you know?" "He regularly takes classes on such subjects. In fact he is one of the best Sir, in the city on such subjects." "You are interested in such subjects?" 

"Yes Sir, I read a lot about Swami Vivekananda and Ramakrishna and Tattva Bodha incidentally is my favorite Subject"
"You mean to say you have read Tattva Bodha?"

"I have read this one by Sivaraman and once you read it you won't feel like keeping that book on the table at all."
"Why what is so great about this Book?" 

"Sir,you must be joking that you don't know about 'Tattva Bodha'." 

"Really I accept my ignorance." 

 

My wife was watching from the corner, admiring all her CD collections. 

"Sir, according to me if you read this it gives the entire Vedantic Saramsam and to say it in-one-word you become a bit more humble in life, leaving  false ego once for all."

 "Is it a fact that reading this simple book one would get so humble?" 

"Of course one should  be involved totally into the text. Needs lot of conviction and devotion."
 
My wife joined the conversation and she felt this girl is indeed a very very talented intelligent girl, so she told me "Why don't you interview her for Washington Post. Why at all you should think of Paris Hilton?"
I also felt that I owe something to her. So I asked her whether she can spare sometime for an interview.
She politely refused saying "My boss is to give me permission. Besides many people are looking for guidance like you and hence I have to go." 

"What is your name?" 

Kalaivani

 

  My wife's admiration for her devotion to duty and her total involvement in her work, made her go direct to the Boss . Sir, that girl Kalaivani." 

"Yes very hard working Girl." 

"This is my husband Viswanath."

"Nice meeting you Sir" 

"He is the Senior Journalist in Washington Post." 

The Boss stood up."Washington Post?" 

"Yes Sir. I would like to interview this girl. I am highly impressed with her ethics."
Boss called her. Time was 5:45 pm. 

"Kalaivani, they have come all the way from USA, they would like to spend sometime with you. Can you?"
"Sir, there are so many customers waiting for some guidance. it is a rush time. If they can come again tomorrow."
"OK. I can come again tomorrow." 

 

I again came next day morning leaving all my appointments with 'Times of India' just to see this girl. It was no rush hour. My wife and myself found out. 

Kalaivani is from a nearby village near Arcot. She has 5 sisters. She is the eldest one. Her father was a drunkard and he died a few years ago caring for none of them. Her mother used to work as a helper in Masonry and passed away two years back, leaving all the 6 on the streets. This girl who had completed her 9th standard decided to search for a job and 'Giri Trading' came forward to help her out. She has brought up all her 5 sisters with her  meager salary and has been taking care of them. All the 5 sisters are going to a nearby Chennai Corporation School. 

"Kalaivani, but when did you get this enthusiasm to learn about 'Tattva Bodha'?"
"Sir after joining here,I decided that the best way to be of help to the customers is to know the subject first. I took small Books on Swami Vivekananda and startedreading.I found the subject so fascinating..I decided to read other books in Tamil like Bagavad Gita and Viveka Choodamani. Thats how."

"What is your salary?" 

"Rs 2500, Sir." 

"Are you able to manage all your expenses with the 5 sisters?"

"Not at all Sir, but the Boss helps me a lot." 

"What is your aim in lIfe?"  

"I want all my sisters to get education. Then they would get easily employments , is it not?"

"If I give monthly Rs 10,000 for meeting all your expenses, would that suffice?" 

"It is indeed too much, but that also I would accept only through my Boss." 

We took her to the Boss and told him that we would like to send Rs.10,000 every month so that all her sisters' education would be completed.  

The Boss said "She deserves it Sir. You can trust me - I will hand over the amount to her every month or alternately you can open an account in her name and start transferring to the account." 

 

My friend John Paul, who is the Regional Manager of 'Times of India' had also come with me. He said "You have done a good thing." 

My wife said "I pray that Karpagambal helps Kalaivani to become an expert in Vedantha and start giving lectures in USA. We can arrange for her lectures."

We left wonder struck! If we go into the interiors of India, how many more jewels like Kalaivani can be found!!      

I really became humbled.

 

CONCLUSION

If we don’t know who we are, we will never truly know what we are capable of.  It should be  our daily pursuits to have  accurate information on our strengths and weaknesses to succeed with a open mind without keeping inhibitions of the status and the post currently held .  Just being blind sided by our own inability or missing out on our true talents will bring nothing more than failure and frustration. Whatever may be our goals, focus must be at the core of our basic  character  , having positive attitude .  It is the  drive that pushes us forward and keeps our momentum , but without focus we will just be moving for the sake of motion.. Success can be obtained by many, but maintaining the drive to reach our goals requires a passion for pursuit and a lust for life.  We can create a to-do list and set our goals with the best of them, but without this necessary habitual hunger, we will most certainly fail to bring to the table the results we imagined.

 

Thank you V.B.Chadha.

 

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Have a safe & peaceful week ahead.

 

MOHANDAS KIZHAKKE.

http://mohandas-sharedthoughts.blogspot.com/