Shared Thoughts. Journey to Happiness.

A journey to happiness I wish to recount an experience I had in a Dubai taxi recently. The driver was a pleasant-looking middle-aged chap and he greeted me with a brief smile when I got in. While waiting at our first traffic signal, on our way to my destination, we saw a young couple on the sidewalk, hand-in-hand, immersed in conversation, going past the line of waiting cars. They seemed quite happy. The woman’s laughter could be heard in the cab. Little did I expect the kind of reaction, this sound of happiness stirred up in the taxi driver. He asked loudly, partly to himself and partly to me: ‘Why was that woman so happy? How could a person be so cheerful?’ Such probing questions kept flowing from him incessantly. Since I was just silent with my own thoughts, the driver kept on talking, whingeing actually. She must be crazy, or so he thought, to be so happy. Not long afterwards, there was a group waiting at the next traffic signal. They too seemed happy by the look on their faces. Their loud laughter and chatter caused yet another mini-tsunami in my friend’s emotions. As I expected, he came up with fresh questions…. What caused happiness? How could a person be happy in Dubai, he lamented; here he was, in Dubai for 20 years, struggling to make both ends meet, his wife back home in Goa, bringing up his two daughters. The sky-rocketing cost of living in Dubai had depleted his savings. He believed everyone else in Dubai had been sharing his tales of woes and yet, these folks seemed happy, really happy. This was unfair, he thought and rightly so for a person on whose shoulders the cares of the world seemed so heavy. How could these people be all happy and smiling? This was all too much for him. I found his questions triggering a chain of thoughts in me and I decided to respond to his monologue. These people, I told him, had decided they would be happy today. They had made up their minds that nothing was going to upset them today. He could also be happy if he wanted to, I told him. All he had to do was just repeat: “I am happy - rather than question why others are happy.” I told him to laugh loudly. Laugh, I urged him. Laugh now, I shouted a command and then I laughed myself. I really felt nice. And I continued to laugh so loudly I could see his eyes were bulging out of their sockets with utter surprise. He must have thought he had picked up a nutter for a passenger. We had reached our  destination by then. While paying for the ride, he asked me if I was all right. Obviously he still had some doubts over it. Then he asked a question I had not expected: “Are you really happy, sir?” I told him: “Yes, I am happy.” In fact I yelled at him (and the world) that I was happy and then I went on my way, leaving behind a flabbergasted and perplexed cabby. I then thought to myself whether I could justify what I had just told him, that I was really happy. Well, if happiness is where my needs equal the means, then I am happy. If happiness is lack of fear for today or tomorrow, then I am happy. If happiness is where there is hope for today or tomorrow, then I am happy. If happiness is where there is health, then I am happy. If happiness is where there is love waiting for me, then I am happy. If happiness is where there are many to love, then I am happy. If happiness is where there is no one to hate, then I am happy. If happiness is where I am wanted,  then I am happy. If happiness is the absence of sadness, yes, I am happy still, because I am only grieving and past the stage of sadness. In grieving, there is a deep unfathomable sense of missing. Since I have decided to be happy, I can only recall the happy moments of the past, even in my grief*. So happiness is your choice, a surreal destination, existing out there somewhere, yet so easily accessible, if you just choose to look beyond the immediate. (*We lost our only son in a road accident in India in September 2007. Grief and memories flood my being every moment of the day, even as I go through life, appreciating the goodness of God’s miracles in every sight and sound around me, wondering why one such miracle could not have saved an innocent life as his with so much to live for.) K P Mohandas,Kpmdas2000@yahoo.com