What does one really want..?

SHARED THOTS - 31.05.14. 
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What does one really want..? 

She looked like the kind of woman I could fall in love with. Trouble is, she
was standing next to the kind of woman I’d like to make love to. ” 
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The Stone Cutter - Anthony de Mello

There was once a stone cutter who was dissatisfied with himself and with his
position in life. One day he passed a wealthy merchant's house. Through the
open gateway, he saw many fine possessions and important visitors.
"How powerful that merchant must be!" thought the stone cutter. He became
very envious and wished that he could be like the merchant.

To his great surprise, he suddenly became the merchant, enjoying more
luxuries and power than he had ever imagined, but envied and detested by
those less wealthy than himself. Soon a high official passed by, carried in
a sedan chair, accompanied by attendants and escorted by soldiers beating
gongs. Everyone, no matter how wealthy, had to bow low before the
procession.

"How powerful that official is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a high
official!"

Then he became the high official, carried everywhere in his embroidered
sedan chair, feared and hated by the people all around. It was a hot summer
day, so the official felt very uncomfortable in the sticky sedan chair. He
looked up at the sun. It shone proudly in the sky, unaffected by his
presence.

"How powerful the sun is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the sun!"

Then he became the sun, shining fiercely down on everyone, scorching the
fields, cursed by the farmers and labourers. But a huge black cloud moved
between him and the earth, so that his light could no longer shine on
everything below.

"How powerful that storm cloud is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a
cloud!"

Then he became the cloud, flooding the fields and villages, shouted at by
everyone. But soon he found that he was being pushed away by some great
force, and realized that it was the wind.

"How powerful it is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the wind!"

Then he became the wind, blowing tiles off the roofs of houses, uprooting
trees, feared and hated by all below him. But after a while, he ran up
against something that would not move, no matter how forcefully he blew
against it - a huge, towering rock.

"How powerful that rock is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a rock!"

Then he became the rock, more powerful than anything else on earth. But as
he stood there, he heard the sound of a hammer pounding a chisel into the
hard surface, and felt himself being changed.

"What could be more powerful than I, the rock?" he thought.

He looked down and saw far below him the figure of a stone cutter.

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Desire is the root cause of all unhappiness.. Lord Buddha.

Order is heaven’s first law.. and this means, some are and some must be,
greater than others…. I cannot recall who said this, but these are words of
wisdom from an English poet, we read about in school.

These two are deeply etched in my mind from growing up days. No matter how
good you are at anything, you always come across someone who is superior to
you not entirely because he is more talented. Once this ‘law’ is accepted,
then many a situation that can otherwise hurt, can be handled with
equanimity and dignity. No amount of desire to be the best, ensures you will
not come across someone better than you, simply because this ‘law’ exists
and is true.

Desire is necessary nevertheless. Unfulfilled desires are perhaps the root
cause of all unhappiness, just as it is not the money that is the root cause
of all evil, but the lack of money that is; similarly, empty desire or blind
desire ‘per se’ can cause a lot of unhappiness; but a desire for something
that is a passion, is good and necessary. 

“Nothing stops the person who desires deeply to achieve…” Thomas Carlyle. We
see “desire” more as a stimulus for something else – desire to achieve,
desire to love, desire to be loved, desire to be a better person, desire –
as a craving, as a want, as a wish-for…. is what spurred the growth of
civilizations and humankind. 
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What does a man really want:  Om Swami. 

Once upon a time a man owned a beautiful garden full of awesome flowers and
fruit trees. Melodious and colorful birds tweeted, bees droned and
butterflies fluttered about in that garden. It was a lively place, like a
piece of paradise. It had a small pond too housing many kinds of lotuses.
The owner cared for his garden more than anything else in the world. In
particular, he loved a rare flower, a black Himalayan lotus with a heady
scent that flowered in all seasons.

One morning, he was tending to the roses and tulips while a nightingale sang
most sweetly. He longed to see the bird more closely and went in the
direction of the sound. There he saw the young bird pecking at the black
lotus. Its petals had come off and the lotus was mostly destroyed. He was
furious and hurled a rock at the bird but the nightingale took a swift
flight and escaped unscathed.

Grieved and angered, he vowed to catch and kill the bird. Scattering barley,
sesame seeds and jaggery near the pond, he spread a net and waited
patiently. Surely, a little while later, the nightingale came flying again
and noticed the food. She landed on the mesh and ate to her heart's content
but, realized her mistake when it was time to take off; she was stuck.

The man got hold of the bird and clutched it tightly by the neck. "I'll kill
you," he said.
"Kill me? But, why? The food was lying on the ground. I didn't steal from
your granary."
"No, not for these grains but because you destroyed my black lotus."
"I'm sorry," the nightingale pleaded. "I was only following my food chain.
Have mercy. I always thought that the owner of this beautiful garden must be
a tender, caring and a loving person. Little did I know..."
The man thought about it and a sense of compassion enveloped him. 

"Okay, I'll let you go." He loosened his grip.
"I want to tell you a secret, my friend," the nightingale said. "My vision
is penetrating. There's buried a pot full of gold at the root of the old
peepal tree in your garden. It's yours for the taking."

The man dug up the pot filled with gold coins and was ecstatic beyond bear.

"I'm curious," he said to the nightingale perched on the bough. "How come
you could see the treasure hidden under the land but couldn't see the wide
net clearly spread on the ground?"
"I had no use or craving for the gold, but I longed to eat the sesame seeds
and jaggery. While flying towards the food, all I could see was the food. My
desire had made me blind."

That's pretty much all one needs to know: desires make us blind. A mad
pursuit of endless desires makes one oblivious to what's already there to be
enjoyed. That's why Buddha called it the root of all suffering and that's
why Krishna preached detachment from the outcome of desires. Desires keep
you busy, they keep you on your toes, and above all, they make everything
you already have appear small and lacking.

You have a house and the desire to have a bigger house will repeatedly make
you feel that what you have is not enough. Your partner loves you but the
desire to have more or something else from him or her will make you feel
incomplete in the present. The desire to earn more, to have more, to be
more, to gain more and so on become great barriers to enjoying the present
moment.

I'm not suggesting that you can't have desires. Sometimes, the journey of
pursuing the object of your desire can be an exhilarating one too. Until you
reach the exalted state, it's perfectly fine to have your desires and to
pursue them, it's okay to feel elated upon their fulfillment or feel low
when they are not met. It's human, it's natural. But, it certainly helps to
be conscious of what you are pursuing in life. 

It can be a life-changing exercise ­­— to sit down in peace and question the
desires you have because once you become aware of your pursuits, you start
to see things in a new light. Predominantly because chasing your desires
with awareness does not make you blind, because mindfulness doesn't allow
you to lose sight of what you already have. This awareness keeps you
positive, it keeps you happy. It allows you to see both the net on the
ground and the pot hidden under the soil.

So, do you really want what you really want?

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“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that
what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”

Epicurus. 

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Have an enjoyable week ahead. 
MOHANDAS. KP.

http://mohandas-sharedthoughts.blogspot.com/

Expats in Gulf.

SHARED THOTS - 25.04.14. 
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A budding artist exhibited his recently done painting (piece of art), in a
public place, with great confidence.  Before he went home for lunch, he left
a note requesting the viewers to mark with a (X), wherever they felt there
was a mistake. When he came back in the evening, he was shocked beyond words
to find every inch of his favourite painting, covered with numerous (X)s. In
tears, he ran back to his Great Master, from whom he had learnt art.

"Go and paint another piece of art" commanded the Master. "Before exhibiting
it, come to me for guidance".

In a few days, the student completed another beautiful painting and took it
to his Master, who whispered some instructions in his ears. Returning to the
public place, the budding artist put up his painting on display. 

However, this time, he left a request note asking the viewers to CORRECT any
mistakes which they might find in the artist's painting. He provided some
bottles of paint and a few brushes to do the correction and left for lunch.
When he returned in the evening, he was surprised to find that his painting
was left untouched by any of the viewers! 

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The above story sums up the flak received by the expat community in Gulf
countries, especially in societies like Saudi Arabia & Kuwait, where the
checks & controls are the highest. 

The name of the game here is – blame & find fault. Blame the expats for
everything – from traffic jams, petty thefts, crime, road rage, illegal
activities et al. 

The magic solution that surfaced out of the available local intellect is
simple and swift –  deport all the expats. The society sans the expats will
be simply beautiful and clean !! I am not joking. An actual Govt decision is
being implemented since a year now in Kuwait, affecting the lower strata of
the expat community, with the full punching power of the enforcement. 

No further elucidation is necessary to the consequences of such a fantasy
solution, if ever it becomes a reality, where the vast majority of the
national population are privileged to live from cradle to grave courtesy the
Govt. It is sad to see before our eyes, vast majority of successive
generations losing the will to work, let alone the need to work and earn an
income.  

I am a resident in Kuwait with family, conducting peacefully what I am here
for, with due respect to the laws of the land and co-existing well with the
large expat community & local nationals for our daily lives and for
business. Together with my family, colleagues and quite a big circle of
friends & acquaintances at various levels, we are pretty happy to be here
and feel totally at home. 

Being away from homeland, for past two decades plus, in the Middle East,
this is more ‘home’ to us that the real home, where we feel like fish out of
water in many respects.  We do realize that at the end of the day, when our
innings in this turf is over, we have to head back to our homeland, where we
have to adjust quite a bit, to feel ‘local’ again after the long spell of
being just a visitor, always with a return ticket. The very thought gives
most of us a feeling of ‘discomfort’ .. though it is known that all those
who headed back with no return tickets, are happy and contented, especially
the youngsters, with the doors wide open to the nature, rather than the
confines of temperature controlled living. 

It is not the temperature alone that is controlled in our daily lives here
in the Gulf. The six countries that form the GCC, have controls of different
rigidity, wherein Saudi Arabia can be considered as the most rigid, followed
by Kuwait. The other four nations are almost on par with respect to social &
moral controls – the UAE being the least rigid perhaps. 

In Kuwait, the entire expat community is facing a new level of criticism,
being blamed for all the ills of the society. Expats are found guilty for
many a problem that are but natural by-products of a society which is
multi-culture in nature and very heterogeneous in its composition. 

We were witness to the draconian measures implemented to “capture” erring
expats, over very trivial violations, leading to arbitrary deportations. The
fear psychosis prohibited many to venture out. Shops, restaurants, usual
gathering spots and roads were near empty. Traffic reduced overnight. All
the locals were happy. The local newspapers and columnists praised the
policies and measures taken by the super cop. Over enthusiasm for creating
an Utopia in Kuwait, sans all low level expats, almost led to creation of a
near Dystopian society*. 

Among the deported are those found violating visa rules. Forgotten is the
sad fact that the expats thus found at fault, are mere victims.. while those
behind this menace, the hiring companies owned by locals, laugh all the way
to the bank enriching themselves out of the sweat, toil and tears of those
whose voice will never be heard and to whom justice is but a distant dream. 

The nations that form the GCC were a happy-go-lucky laid back tribal
settlements living in harsh conditions at the mercy of vast expanse of
brutal desert sands.  From such hamlets that never wake up, to sizzling
metropolis that never sleeps, all within a few decades, has been a
transformation that human settlements have never seen anywhere else in the
world, since the dawn of civilization. 

This sudden boom came about with the discovery of oil, the black gold. One
by one, each nation prospered. The demand for man-power was immense, to
harness this natural resource to its various downstream products and offer
to the hungry world. In return, wealth beyond the wildest of dreams flowed
into these regions. 

The influx of men, materials and machines continued through the years, to
fill various types of needs and skills, in giving shape to brand new
multi-cultural cities. 

The new cities offered varieties of occupation for those willing to come and
settle down on terms & conditions that compensated for factors such as
living away from family, grinding work schedule, harsh weather, alien
culture, language etc. 

With the coming of men, came the needs of men to be also met. Gradually over
the years, the new cities saw expat families settling down to raise a new
generation away from homeland. The luxury of living with families was
confined to a privileged small percentage. The majority of working men
however, continued to live as ‘bachelors’, the trade-mark description of
young men. 

The expat labor, over the years, filled every type of skills required at
homes and beyond, to the extent that the expat population overgrew the local
population manifold. 

The root cause was and continues to be - the need for expat labor skills…
from the lowest level to the highest echelon of society, the expat skills
have come to stay for good, blending with the local population’s investment
potential, to create these cities with teeming millions drawn from all
corners of the globe.  

In so doing, it is but natural, that some ill-effects of society come to
play, which is no exception anywhere in the world. 

“we have all been transformed from citizens with mutual needs into consumers
with competing appetites” Steward Dakers in his essay titled “Don’t blame
the young for society’s ills”. 

For those ‘bachelors’ who visit family once in two years, which is the norm
here, appetite is more than satiating hunger for food. When there is a ready
consumer demand for this kind of appetite, there is always a provider of
‘service’. No society is an exception to the world’s oldest profession.
Similarly, there are service providers to satisfy the consumer appetite for
a “drink”. Strict enforcement purely on religious grounds in isolated
pockets in the region, will always be a “catch me if you can” game.  

Greed, corruption and social illiteracy are prevalent in all societies. If
the Expat community is found to be indulging in this, it is because, there
are willing corroborators among local nationals. Visa trafficking, illegal
driving license in thousands are but a few examples in Kuwait, as there are
other illegal activities prevalent elsewhere.  

Such aberrations aside, it is my sincere hope that there is mutual
recognition and appreciation between the expat community and the local
populace, for the betterment of the nations in this part of the world. One
cannot survive without the other, is a simple truth. 

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*    Dystopian society: A futuristic, imagined universe in which
oppressive societal control and  the illusion of a perfect society are
maintained through corporate, bureaucratic, technological, moral, or
totalitarian control. Dystopias, through an exaggerated worst-case scenario,
make a criticism about a current trend, societal norm, or political system. 
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Wish you all a safe & a happy week end.